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Tuesday, June 19, 2012

And The Academy of Porn Award Winner For Best Picture Is...

String theory, Higgs Boson, blackholes, decadimensional reality, and an infinite amount of coexisting alternative universes... What if every Academy Award winner for Best Picture were a porn? Somewhere in the expanse of existence and non-existence, this happened:

2011 – The Orgasm Artist
2010 – The King’s Penis
2009 – The Butt-Hurt Locker
2008 – Cumdog Millionaire
2007 – No Cunt for Old Men
2006 – The Legs Parted
2005 – Crash Into My Vagina
2004 – Million Dollar Hooker
2005 – The Lord of the Cock Rings: The Return of the Kink
2002 – Debbie Does Chicago
2001 – A Beautiful Rack
2000 – Gladiator Gang-bang
1999 – American Booty
1998 – Shakespeare in Love and in the Butt
1997 – Titanic
1996 – The Erotic Patient
1995 – Breastheart
1994 – Whorest  Pump
1993 – Shindler’s Fuck List
1992 – Unforgiven Whores
1991 – The Silence of the Bearded Clams
1990 – Dances With Whores
1989 – Driving and Fucking Miss Daisy
1988 – Golden Shower Man
1987 – The Last Blowjob
1986 – Poon Platoon
1985 – Out of Africa, Then In, Then Out, Then Back In.
1984 – Ramadickus
1983 – Terms of Bondage
1982 – Randy
1981 – Crotches of Fire
1980 – Ordinary Whores
1979 – Kramer in Kramer
1978 – The Dick Hunter
1977 – Annie Balls